Friday, 25 July 2008

Ah Met a Bonnie Lass

This daft mission is finally over and a'm right glad. That Hogan is a proper bastard and is gonna get me killed some time.

It wasn't all bad though. I met a lass. A right rare beauty called Theresa. Ah could tell she fancied me. Ah looked good in me uniform and ma hair was all mussed up like from all the fightin ah'd been doin. Y'know, wi ma own men.

Theresa is a Spanish lass and a dab hand wi a blade. She likes to kill Frenchies, on account of them rapin her. Oh, and killin her mother and father.

She's off on a dangerous mission the now. Hope she doesn't get shot.


Wednesday, 23 July 2008

First Day on t'Job

Me and the Chosen Men
Ah 'ad a bugger o a day. Met the Chosen Men. Bloody 'ell. Can't get the bastards to do what a say. Bit upset about it like. A give bloody good orders and all they do is moan. Was that mad I beat one o 'em till he was about dead.

The mission is a bit confusin too. Don't know what a'm doin' or where a'm supposed to go. Bloody colonel got 'imself shot, so am on me own now. Supposed to be lookin for some daft banker oo's got 'imself lost in Spain. Well, Spain's a big place, y'know. Ah lost me best sash here the other day and a've no chance o findin it.

Movin' into French occupied territory tomorrah. Hope ah don't get shot.


Ah Saved Wellesley Today

Well, a've gone and got meself promoted. Lieutenant Sharpe, that's me. What would me poor whore-mum say if she could see me now? She'd say, Dick ma son, ah always knew thou had it in thee.

Ah was mindin me own business, havin a bit of a scrub in a pond, when a saw old Wellesley on is 'orse. I thought nothin o it and got back to washin me tunic. Next thing, Wellesley is ridin back, fast like, and e's bein chased by three Frenchies.

So, I got me gun and a killed them. Wellesely was that glad he promoted me. Well, a wiz gobsmacked - there's not many blokes get raised from the ranks.

Dangerous mission tomorrah. Hope a don't get shot.


Sunday, 20 July 2008

Over the Hills and Far Away

Me and the lads.

Well I took the King's shillin and here a am. In Spain. Mucky, dusty, bloody Spain. Ma great-great-great grandchildren'll come ere one day. On package olidays. Tenerife. Ibiza. A'm ere to do ma duty. Kill the Frenchies.

It's not so bad, you know. Ah get a shillin for me pay and the lads are a laff. A'm a dab and we a rifle too and no mistaking. And it's nice to get a bit o better weather. Elps me forget Yorkshire. Ah killed a man there, ye know. There. Ah said it. Can't say a'm proud but a've come ere to forget.

Big battle tomorru. Hope ah don't get shot.